A Baby's Life

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

If I believed in reincarnation I would ask to come back as a baby. 

Apparently a dog's life is where it's at, but I'm not so sure our canine friends have it better than our babies. When you really think about it being a baby is a pretty sweet deal.

- 2 naps a day! Seriously, two naps. When is the last time you ever got 1 nap? And that's on top of a twelve hours night sleep. People complain that their babies don's sleep in, but I want to know when was the last time you got to go to bed at 7?

- a personal shopper. Not only do your parents spend more money and time choosing adorable outfits for you, but you don't even have to dress yourself. 

- someone else washes your hair. Everyone knows the best part of getting your hair done is having it washed. If I was a millionaire I would put one of those washing bowls in my house and have a professions wash my hair for me every day - complete with that little neck massage. Babies get that every single time they bath. 

- a personal maid. Toddlers have to pick up their own toys. Babies don't. Nor do they have to change their own sheets, clean up their own spit-up, or do their own laundry.

- a personal chef. You don't like vegetables - must spit them out and someone will hand you a graham cracker. Plus, three full meals a day just like clockwork. 

- smiles, smiles smiles. People smile at you all day long. Grandmas stop to pet you. Grocery clerks give you balloons. You are loved for just being cute. Speaking of being cute....

- a world of endless compliments. Doesn't matter if your fat, skinny, tall or short most people will tell you you're adorable for just sitting there. 

- fat is in. The fatter you are the better. The objective is to get eat and get fat. 

- endless entertainment. No one is happy when you're bored so the adults in the room will go to great lengths to make sure you're having fun. Not enjoying one toy - why not try another. Bored with toys - try a baby video. It's all about whatever your little heart desires. 

- being pushed in a stroller. Sounds ridiculously relaxing to me. 

- and positive affirmation around every corner. Working adults usually only get told when they screw up. As a baby you get endless amounts of praise, kisses, and applause for doing the simplest of tasks - standing up, crawling around, saying a word, holding your own spoon, drinking from the sippy cup, and putting your arm through your own shirt sleeve. 

Life as a baby is pretty much a picnic. 


Jessica G. said...

This is too funny! I am ready to come back as a baby! The ironic part is, whenever Connor is fussy, I always ask him if it because his life is so hard...kidding of course. Why do babies cry? They have it so easy and later in life will be given some reasons to cry!

Linda Z said...

Sounds pretty good to me! :) And no one cares if you carry your blankie around everywhere!

Tim and Debra said...

Fat is in... my personal favorite

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