WAITING

I'm going to warn you that this post is nothing more than a ridiculous whine-fest.

I'm terrible at waiting. 

Actually, I take that back. Apparently I'm pretty good at it for about 6 months, but 6 months seems to be my personal limit and then I begin to crack.

I am ready to see my children. I am ready to have my family together and move on with life. For more than 9 months (14 months if you include paperwork chasing and 2 years if you count waiting for RJ to get on the adoption wagon) I've been waiting for a dark-skinned lovey from Africa. For nearly 30 weeks I've been waiting for the arrival of another precious son.

At first I was able to wait with purpose and good-cheer. Now I'm over it. 

I KNOW God is teaching me things during this period of waiting. I KNOW that He holds the timing completely in His hands and that His timing is ALWAYS perfect. I KNOW that compared to so many other people's struggles and hurts I haven't even been waiting for all that long. I have a dear friend that has been waiting for healing for a chronic illness for years. Who am I to complain?! But my heart is once again having a tough time catching up with my head. My head gets that waiting is just part of the game. Part of the refining process. My heart wants to scream and shout and throw a toddler-sized temper tantrum because I am yearning for the next phase.

Funny thing is I also know that in only 10 weeks one of my little people will make his grand debut. And a few weeks later I'll be so exhausted I'll probably wish I could go back in time to when he was safely and quietly tucked away inside me. Back to when life was relatively simple and quiet - and I was just waiting.

Friday Favorites

There are few things quite as annoying as children's music.

I will occasionally put on a kids station while listening to Pandora but until recently I had refused to endure the sing-song lyrics of Raffie while driving. 

Then I heard Landon bust-out a mildly inappropriate Katy Perry lyric from his carseat; and I realized it was time to rethink my priorities.

My girlfriend had given me two Seeds of Encouragement CDs months earlier gushing about their wonderfulness. "These CDs are not only easy to listen to but actually enjoyable," she insisted. "Plus, both my daughter and I are learning scriptures through the songs."

And I have to admit - she was right.

The Seeds CDs are rockin'.

Just straight scripture set to music they are absolutely not annoying - I actually really enjoy a few of the songs.

They're help me memorize more Bible in the past month that in the past ten years AND I get the sweet pleasure of hearing a tiny two-year old voice belt out 

"Do not be anxious, about anything..."

Plus, I've taught Landon that each song is about God, so he asks me what each one means and it has opened up wonderful conversations.

You can find the CD's here at Seeds Family Worship.

We have Seeds of Encouragement and Seeds of Courage. 

Landon and I both like Seeds of Courage a bit better but both are excellent.

3 Months Left

 

When I think about our little guy making his big arrival in a mere 3 months I get a bit overwhelmed. Yet, when I think about being pregnant for 3 MORE MONTHS I get totally overwhelmed. 

I am over being pregnant. Honestly I don't have anything in particular to complain about, just the regular aches and discomforts. I'm just ready to have my full energy and my body back. But, since this very well could by my last pregnant I am trying to enjoy it and savor the closeness of having my little guy literally attached to me and to me alone.

13 weeks seems like a long time but our list of things to do and enjoy before our newest arrival will definitely help time pass quickly. Over the next few months we are looking to:

- finish the boys' room

- covert our spare room/den into a playroom

- enjoy a few special activities with Landon such Kids Space in Pasadena 

- visit with Uncle Matthew, Aunt Jessica and Aunt Kaitlyn!!!

- celebrate Landon's 3rd birthday

- try to get away for a long weekend without L

- attend a big adoption conference that's being hosted in California this year

- and soak-up the last few moment of being a family of 3!

Oh, Hello Blog

For nearly two weeks I've been so overwhelmingly busy I haven't been able to write blogs, read blogs, discover new blogs, or anything. It's amazing how out of the loop I feel. The blog community has become a small, yet significant part of my life, and I really miss it when I have to stay away.  

There are a few reasons for my short hiatus: Landon gave me his nasty flu-bug and I couldn't shake it for nearly 3 weeks, I have a new challenge/commitment ahead of me that I've been preparing for (more on this to come soon), I actually got to do a bit of work with a former colleague, I've been crafting (I know, gasp!) and then just the everyday occurrences and relationships. Not to mention, L's naps are getting shorter giving me barely enough time to eat my lunch and get the house straightened up before he's awake again. I'm going to have to find a new window of time in my day to write posts. 

It's was incredibly fun working with my former colleague and good friend this past week. Just a small project, but it felt great to exercise that part of my mind once again. I really love not working and being home with Landon, but I do worry about losing my edge. I'm afraid I'll head back into the workforce ten years from now (or sooner) and be completely lost - everything I once knew obsolete and irrelevant in our fact-changing society. But when I look back on the past few years I realize God has been taking care of me all along. I've had four editing jobs land in my lap since transferring to stay-at-home-motherhood. The jobs haven't been paid, but they've allowed me to continue to hone my skills and stay just a tiny bit involved in the industry. It's been just enough too; because although I've enjoyed the work it's hard to juggle home, kids, husband and job. I greatly admire women who do it regularly.

Maybe at some point I'll return to work, but if I do I'm certain of one thing: it's my house that's going to suffer, because there is no way I'm missing out on precious moments with this little dude. They are flying by way to fast as it is!

Awesome/Awkward

My friend Jessica (Jess - if i knew how to link you from my iphone I totally would!) sometimes does these AWESOME posts called awesome/awkward. They are hilarious.

The other day at Trader Joes I saw something that just screamed Awesome/Awkward so I'm going to be totally Awkward and rip off her idea (which I believe she may have stolen from someone else, so now it's a tend, which is awesome.)

AWESOME: Trader Joes now does cheese samples! So not only do I get a mini cup of coffee and a small snack while shopping but now Landon and I get a cheese chunk too. Yippee

AWKWARD: Last time I was at the cheese tray of freebies I noticed an average looking, middle-aged woman loading a napkin with cheese samples and sneaking them into her purse. Odd but possibly understandable. It was really good cheese. Ten minutes later I find her in the parking lot in the car next to me feeding the dozen plus cats in her backseat!!!! Waaaayyy awkward.


In other news I've taken to wearing leg warmers recently. Awesome or awkward? You tell me.

Sugary Sweet

Anyone else on absolute sugar overload from the holidays? Maybe it's just me and my pregnant belly but this year felt particularly indulgent, and we still have loads of sweets in our pantry. At one point RJ casually mentioned, "I think we should put the Sees candy box up higher because Landon seems to be getting into it." Yeeaaahhhh, that's definitely Landon's doing alright...
 
I am actually sick of sugar, candy, ice cream, cookies and cakes. Yet, I still find myself eating it once  twice  up to three times a day! The probablem with sugar is once you start you just can't stop. The white stuff is addictive.

Having pregnancy as an excuse you would think I would just embrace 9 months of indulgence, but I actually feel quite guilty. At this point of my pregnancy whatever I eat the little dude both eats and tastes, and he is enjoying way too many sweets for one so young.

And he's not the only young lad who has been spoiled recently. A certain two year old seems to think that lolipops and snickerdoodles make up their own food group.

Quitting sugar cold-turkey is hard and honestly unrealistic for me and my family. We like our sweets. But we need to cut back and make them a special occurrence rather than the norm. During her 30 days of clean eating my friend Erin raved about a bunch of vegan, low/no sugar dessert recipes over at Chocolate Covered Katie. I remember thinking those sounded cool and then promptly heading to the kitchen for my second piece of marshmallow fudge.

I forgot about the healthy dessert blog until it popped up on Pinterest the other day and I decided to check it out. That gal Katie is a chocolate-covered vegan genius. The desserts on her blog look amazing and most of them are chalk full of healthy ingredients. This afternoon I was craving my usual after lunch dessert so I whipped-up some of this:

Cookie Dough Dip

Dip that tastes like cookie dough. Seriously. So. Good. I ate it on a graham cracker and my sugar craving was completely satisfied.

There is sugar in the recipe but way less than regular cookie dough. Plus, no raw eggs (yay for this preggers gal) and no butter. The fat comes from healthy almond butter and I added flax seed for an extra nutritional kick. The main ingredient: garbanzo beans. Basically it's chocolate chip hummus. Don't gag - I know it sounds really weird but it is surprisingly delicious. (I will be completely honest- if you think about eating garbanzo beans while chowing down you can taste them just the littlest bit, but if you didn't know you would never be able to tell.)


I am so excited to offer this to Landon for dessert tonight. I just know he's going to love it and I'm going to be silently chuckling watching him eat a big serving of beans and nuts while thinking I'm the best Mom in the whole wide world for allowing him dessert.

Weekend Update

It has been mellow weekend. Landon had a 102 degree temperature on Friday so we've kept close to home. Lots of puzzles, movies, stickers and hot "tea".

Poor little sicky was complaining of feeling cold Saturday afternoon despite his sweats and socks. Knowing I love a warm cuppa when chilled I thought he might enjoy his first brew. I dunked a peppermint teabag in warm water for two seconds, added lots of milk and a heaping teaspoon of honey. The little man loved his warm beverage and kept cupping his hands around the mug and saying, "mmmmm hot tea. mmmmmm" between sips. Pretty much the cutest boy ever.